13 Guaranteed Ways To Help Sustain Any Long-Term Relationship
Have you ever made silly mistakes that ruined great relationships? Below we would like to share with you our tops tips to help avoid disconnections and traits to make your relationships flourish!
There are plenty of opinions out there about what you should do to ensure a happy, long-lasting relationship. Parents say that it's all about communication, your best friend swears by keeping things romantic — and don't even get us started on the lessons we all think we can learn from our favourite TV programmes and films.
With so much conflicting advice out there, it's hard to keep track of what we're really supposed to be doing to keep our relationships going strong. In certain studies successful couples have been calmer than unhappy couples. The individuals within broken relationships often exhibited quick heart rates and active sweat glands in interviews, showing a lack of trust and intimacy, which was evident in their physiology.
Four key traits of successful relationships are compromise, kindness, compassion and generosity. This may seem like a no-brainer, but kindness is about more than just “being nice.” Successful couples generously give their time and attention, with one partner frequently “turning toward” the other emotionally instead of brushing them off. Successful couples of six years plus were observed meeting their partner’s emotional needs nine out of 10 times, while unsuccessful couples met those needs just three out of 10 times according to a recent study.
There are also common correlations between individuals in short term relationships scanning social environments for partners mistakes. Rather than scanning social environments for things to appreciate and say thank you for, which purposefully builds a culture of respect and appreciation.
Here are YK Daily's 13 ways to create happy relationships with longevity...
Pick Your Battles & Fight Kindly With Healthy Conflicts
Surprise—conflicts can be healthy in relationships! If you go into a relationship expecting never to fight, then your first fight could very well lead to the end of the relationship. Instead, learn strategies for healthy conflict resolution, and talk about them with the other person beforehand.
Master couples do argue, but they know how to express their anger constructively. Instead of making accusations in the heat of the moment, explain why you are hurt and upset. Also, when a conflict does arise, start by highlighting how much you care about the other person and the relationship. Talk about both the facts and how you feel about them. Avoid the blame game, and instead be as generous as possible when interpreting the other person’s actions.
Addressing small disagreements in their early stages can actually prevent huge blowouts from manifesting. Learning to embrace conflicts and from the disagreement is an important life skill. Be open to changing your mind, if you discover you made the mistake, apologise quickly and profusely. At the end of any conflict, focus on reconnecting and rebuilding emotional bonds strained by the conflict.
While it’s important to embrace healthy conflicts, it is especially important to prioritise what disagreements are worth fighting about. No one wants to be nit-picked about every little thing, so if you feel yourself picking a fight over something petty, take a step back and reflect on your mood, the situation, and the actual cause of your annoyance or negative feelings.
Be Honest & Trust
Learning to trust another person can be a scary task, because it requires giving up a certain degree of autonomy and allowing yourself to be vulnerable. But, trust is extremely important to cultivate in a long-term relationship, because it creates security which can allow for more emotional connection.
Any issues you avoid, or truths you don’t want to acknowledge, will likely undermine your relationship. It’s better to face the truth squarely in the face right now and address it, rather than let it sabotage your relationship in the long run.
If your partner says they are doing something to make you happy, believe them. Don't overanalyse or try to sleuth out ulterior motives. Generosity is all about being giving with your love and appreciation. If they do not show the same, then re-evaluate your own level of commitment, as the relationship likely will not work in the long term.
In the age of social media, it’s easy to compare yourself and your relationship to what you see posted online. Deep down we know that people curate their social media presences to show the good and exciting parts of their lives. This is the same when people post about their relationships. All relationships go through ups and downs, no matter what is reflected on a couple’s Instagram feed. Don’t fall into the trap of feeling inadequate or unloved because of unfair comparisons prompted by social media.
Show Interest & Share Joy
Having a bad day is not an excuse to disengage. The true test of your kindness and generosity comes when you're not feeling at the top of your game. When a partner makes a bid for your attention and yo